The Comfort of Regularity is a humorous and insightful poem about one of the most ordinary yet essential aspects of human life: bowel movements. What begins as a playful topic that delights young children gradually unfolds into a serious reflection on health, aging, and our dependence on modern technology. For children, regularity is a sign of vitality; for older adults, it is closely linked to concerns such as blood pressure and nighttime urination. The poem then turns to the very contemporary predicament of a malfunctioning toilet, showing how a single broken part can disrupt the rhythm of daily life. By weaving together the simple triad of good sleep, good appetite, and healthy elimination, the poem reminds us that true well-being often depends on the most basic bodily functions—and that even our most natural acts are now intertwined with the conveniences and vulnerabilities of technological civilization.
The Comfort of Regularity
A story about poop.
The little children loved it.
Energy and poop are the best of friends.
Young children absolutely hate constipation.
Good sleep, good appetite, and good bowel movements—
the true barometers of health.
Older people worry about their bowels.
Straining sends the blood pressure up.
There is no emergency button at home.
So they keep things soft to reduce the risk.
Frequent urination that interrupts sleep is troublesome enough.
Even a hearty appetite must be restrained when things get backed up.
Maintaining health begins with regular elimination.
When the toilet starts leaking, what a disaster!
The rhythm of life falls out of order.
Even the repairman is helpless without the right part.
If the manufacturer cannot provide it, repairs are postponed.
One is forced to hold back, trying not to “go.”
Such is the strange inconvenience of today’s “convenient” toilets.
In the modern world, one faulty part can become a true ordeal.
A single electronic remote controls everything.
If it malfunctions, must the whole device be discarded?
And if the high-tech toilet can no longer be operated...
it becomes little more than a useless imitation of a toilet.
Even this troubled toilet depends on spare parts being in stock.
The newer the models become, the shorter the storage life of replacement parts.
Modern people have entrusted their worries about bowel movements to the toilet itself.
What an astonishingly modern conclusion to our technological civilization.
Written on May 19, 2026. The comfort of a toilet is directly connected to the comfort of regularity.