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Escaping / Slipping Away

This poem revolves around the single Japanese word nukeru (“to come out,” “to escape,” “to be removed,” “to stand out,” or “to lose”).
Through its shifting meanings, the poem explores being cut from competition, breaking free from harmful influences, adapting to city life, repeating failures, releasing anger, and struggling against loneliness.
What begins as wordplay gradually reveals the fragility of human pride, emotion, and connection.


Escaping / Slipping Away

To be cut.

Removed.
A mistake becomes a fatal wound.
My name vanished from the roster.
A comeback is difficult.
The next chance may never come soon.
I watch the fierce competition of professionals.

To break away.

I refuse a malicious invitation.
I escaped the chains called friendship.
Retaliation is frightening.
I refused to commit the wrong.
I protected a conscience that would not be corrupted.

To become refined.

Dyed in the colors of the city,
even my speech pretends to be fashionable.
I wanted people to say I had become polished.
Yet nothing inside truly changed.
The winds across the campus felt pleasant.

Unable to break free.

Repeating the same failures.
Foolishness settles into my nature.
It does not seem to be a matter of learning ability.
I resign myself to calling it my disposition.
Even so, the world keeps turning.

Ready to explode.

Bitterness rises against this harsh world.
Burning emotions become difficult to control.
I want to drain away the impulse to run blindly.
Words calmly expose the truth.
They lower the heat of fury and warn against bias.

Must not withdraw.

I writhe within society’s entanglements.
I grow irritated by watchful, interfering eyes.
I cannot fully become alone.
I wish for the dullness not to react to every word.
Perhaps life is painful when one is truly alone.

〔Written on May 22, 2026.“I became fixated on the word ‘nuku / nukeru.’”〕
“I became fixated on the word ‘nuku / nukeru.’”〕

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